A Lesson on Satanism

Well Mom, the 3 things that Germany has on America are: Bratwursts, bakeries and chocolate. I imagine the easiest option would be bratwursts, but Bro Weser would probably know better than I do. That's funny, seems like Jonathan's whole friend group got or is getting sent to Japan. I've been getting weekly emails from his friend Chris, I better get in contact with Jonathan as well. As traumatic as your kindergarten experience may have been mom, at least you didn't ever explode in your undies in the middle of story time. I could tell that mowing season began Lisa, as on Tuesday I was assaulted by hay fever. Pretty sure I got a solid 7 sneezes within 15 seconds that morning. You'll have to let me know how that smooching babes on the beach part goes, Andy. I think that would be a more impressive achievement than anything else you do in Costa Rica. Interesting strategy Heidi, having a baby just so you can get out of date night with Steve? At our worldwide missionary training thing, Elder Andersen also talked about how understanding the Atonement makes us want to share it with others. Definitely makes sense. I'm afraid I didn't take advantage of April Fool's day nearly as much as you did, Joey. I'll have to repent and do better next year. That seems unfair though Jake, I don't get to go to Chuck E Cheese's when I poop in the potty. Yeah Dad, work is definitely a blessing. We'll try our best at having a healthy week.

So, things are starting to pick up again here in Stadthagen. All signs of Elder Barboza's sickness are gone now, aside from playing tag with the doctor, trying to figure out what caused it all. This week we were able to meet with a couple of the old investigators I had tried to call, which went fairly well. One was an older guy who has a lot of respect for the church and its members (apparently at one point he even gave a talk and was in charge of making the weekly program) but he got a little bit sour when the ward in his city, which is about an hour away from Stadthagen, got merged with the Stadthagen ward. Since then he's stopped coming to church and has re-developed problems with coffee and smoking. But he's a super nice guy, hopefully we'll be able to get him back into the game.

Another old investigator we met with was a guy in his mid 20s, who has been on a sort of religion search since age 16, after his sister died. He's investigated Buddhism, the Jehovah Witnesses, Mormonism and...Satanism. He really likes the church, especially the concept of eternal families, but he feels like he hasn't received an answer that it's all true, even though he's read the Book of Mormon and frequently prayed about it. He's had a pretty tough life, but somehow he's ended up a really awesome guy. He told us that even Satanism has taught him valuable lessons, which I guess I'll take his word for. Hopefully we'll be able to continue meeting with him and help him to receive/recognize an answer.

As for our current investigators, slow and steady wins the race I suppose. The younger couple we've been meeting with are understanding everything really well, and say that it sounds good, but getting them to read the Book of Mormon and pray is like pulling teeth. Hopefully we'll be able to change that. Another guy we met with, who before had very little desire to read or pray, has started to do both and wants to start coming to church. So you never know I guess.

Anywho, the weeks keep flying by. Think it's safe to say that few experiences the world has to offer can top that of a missionary. Of course doing missionary work as a member is probably a close second, hint hint :). But yeah, keep keeping on and have a solid week!

Elder Larsen

A Totally "Sick" Week

Ja Mutti, ich kann dich doch verstehen. Ich liebe dich auch. Hoffentlich werde ich eines Tages die Celestiale Sprache so gut wie Englisch beherrschen. What snacks are going to be German, Mom? I've learned that there's more to Germany than just beer and brats. Strangely enough, I don't think I even had my first brat until 3 or 4 months in. Lisa, am I supposed to know who on earth this Lambchop person is? Glad you and Joey are spreading the good news of ultimate frisbee. I'll keep your advice in mind, Heidi. If I'm ever 36 weeks pregnant, I'll try to avoid giant shopping sprees. Funny that you asked, Joey. It was past midnight here at the end of the last session of General Conference, so I was indeed asleep for the closing prayer. Sounds like you're rocking the missionary work over there. Andy, have you been playing at all with the old dudes? Go remind them who the best ultimate players are. The German's coming pretty well, I can understand most of what's said. Still some annoying grammar rules that I don't really have totally figured out, but it's sure a lot better than it was a few months ago. I really liked Elder Holland's talk as well, Dad. I think that's a message that a lot of people need to hear.

Quite the exciting week over here. Monday evening we listened to the last session of general conference (due to the time difference we weren't able to watch it on Sunday). I think what happened would be pretty well explained in that picture that Elder Holland showed during his talk. Tomorrow caught us. In the middle of the night I hear some unearthly noises coming from the bathroom. A couple minutes later Elder Barboza enters the room.
"Are you ok?"
"Nope"
After which he rushes back into the bathroom. A few hours later there wasn't really much left in his stomach. That morning the ward mission leader and I gave him a blessing, and finally in the afternoon the vomitting came to an end. With him obviously being in no shape to work, I spent my time calling ancient investigators, updating records and watching cheesy old church videos. On Wednesday we received reinforcements from the Minden Elders and basically tag-teamed with them so we could keep some of our appointments in Stadthagen. After that Elder Barboza was starting to feel better, and we managed to get a bit of work done. Poor Elder had it pretty rough. Still can't eat any meat without pretty much dying.

We did manage to talk for a few minutes with our investigators from Afghanistan. With the policies on teaching people from potentially dangerous countries, it's important that we make sure their parents aren't hostile to christianity, so we had them call their parents (who live currently in Iraan) a few weeks ago. Ever since then it's been very hard to reach them. Their parents don't want them to have any thing to do with us. No baptism, no visiting the church, no Book of Mormon, no meeting with missionaries. It's really tough, because they have strong testimonies. At the end of our conversation they told us that they just need time to try to work things out.

Yesterday we got our transfer calls, and me and Elder Barboza will be staying here in Stadthagen. After the last couple difficult weeks, it'll be good to have this transfer to get back in the game. Having had a couple days of doing basically nothing, I'm ready to go back to work. It's funny, part of me thought it would be nice to relax for a couple days, but not being able to go out and work is actually a bit depressing.

Anywho, keep being awesome and keep strengthenin them testimonies. Have a good week!

Elder Larsen

The Celestial Language

Unfortunately Mom, if anything people seemed even more opposed to religion during Easter. The suggestion that there's more to Easter than the Easter Bunny and painted eggs seemed to offend them. Though we did get a pretty good turnout at church on Easter. Luckily I wouldn't know about the German Lisa, since we ended up having an English translation for General Conference. I think you're right about the simplicity of the Gospel. I used to think that obscure events or difficulties were signs that God was angry at me, or that I was doing something wrong if I didn't feel the Holy Ghost speaking to me in the exact way I wanted Him to. But when it comes down to it Heavenly Father, His Gospel, and life in general are pretty simple and straightforward. Yeah Andy, me and Abe have been keeping in touch. Typically just a short 1 or 2 sentence email each week. His email is abraham.ogles@myldsmail.net. Yeah Dad, lots of marriage/family talks. Some things didn't feel super applicable for mission life, but others did. I think a companionship has its similarities to marriage. Sounds like you're officially an old man Joey, 33? I can't believe you would play poo sticks without me.

Welp, not the greatest week in the world as our investigators go. Both appointments with the new investigators fell out, as well as 3 of the others that we had scheduled. And then sadly no one ended up coming to General Conference.

But General Conference itself pretty much made up for it. President Uchtdorf's comment about German being the Celestial language basically summed it up. But really though, so much amazingness. Forgiveness, Humility, multiple reminders that we are all God's children, and that we all have a divine heritage, purpose and potential. Who needs Christmas when you've got General Conference?

Anywho, with the help of Prophetic advice, I think we'll be able to get things picking back up over here, hopefully it'll help us all, missionaries, members and non-members to change our lives for the better :)

Have a good week!

Elder Larsen

"Our primary concern should be the success of others"

"I know it in my mind, but do I believe it in my heart?"

"No life is so shattered that it can't be repaired."

"Choose the hard rights, over the easy wrongs."

Zionists

Well Mom, unfortunately they believe in actually celebrating Easter here, which means that most stores are closed today. But next week we should (hopefully) have a normal pday where we can do some shopping. Anywho, sounds like you're having lots of fun. Colonoscopies, implants, violent children...just save some for me. I imagine there's still some mouth adventures in store for me. Whoops Andy, I got distracted last week and forgot to explain my sweet basketball experience. Us and 4 Elders from Hannover played some 3v3 basketball. After a while of ol' Elder Larsen takin em out down low with lay-ups and rebounds, someone's like "Man, Elder Larsen!" and then another Elder's like "All he's doing is making lay-ups." So then I had to go ahead and swish a couple 3-pointers. But don't worry, I got humbled after playing soccer today. Well Lisa and Michelle, I'm not positive how I feel about this ultimate frisbee business. Seems like I'll be needing to set things straight when I get back. Or maybe it'll be as Joey said, and I'll be converted to the wickedness of soccer. Heidi, I think I'll have to take your word on Freezer meals being the best. Good to hear that Savvy and Abby aren't (yet) experiencing the joys of teeth problems. 25 pushups, eh dad? Quite the wild animal. I hope you're training up to play ultimate frisbee.

Okie Dokie

Pretty good week around these parts. Tuesday we met for the second time with a member-referred young couple, who are making pretty good progress. They made it to church yesterday and really enjoyed it. Only potential problem at the moment is that they aren't actually married, although they live together. But at the moment they're doing really well. Still some problems with our older investigators, but we're moving forward.

We had quite a bit of finding time this week, which led us to a couple new investigators. Because of Easter Holiday (kids here get like 2 weeks off of school for Easter), a lot of teenagers were at home, and 2 of them agreed to meet with us. Unfortunately the first appointment, which was supposed to be today, already fell through. We booked it through pouring rain to make it in time, ringed the doorbell, saw him look at us from inside and watched as he walked away into another room. We waited for 5 or so minutes and then gave it up. Ouch.

But on the bright side we have a super solid week ahead of us. Lots to do and little time to do it, nothing is better in the life of a missionary.

Oh, and also this week, we ran into a fun conspiracy theorist guy, who told us that an evil sect called the Zionists are trying to destroy America. Apparently Hilary Clinton and Joe Bidon belong to this group. He then proceeded to wave his arms about and in a loud voice say how all the people walking around us were blind. Just your average day of street contacting :). Anywho, that's about all I've got for this week.


Hope yall have a good one!

Elder Larsen

#Hallelujah

No need to be bashful Mom, I know you're a dancer at heart.
Unfortunately my fatness is also increasing my foot size, so I don't
think the old ones would work out to great. Next week we're going to
Hannover so I'll just go on a shopping spree there. I sure do love
shopping...yessiree. Still getting everyone sick, eh Yhetti? At least
this can put a rest to any sort of false accusations that I ever got
anyone sick, tehee. Interesting stuff, Lisa. I've gotta say though,
aside from the day a brown treat came uncontrollably out of my bum, I
don't remember being particularly nervous or uncomfortable in
kindergarten. Yesterday we had an appointment with a certain Mueller
family. Turns out, one of their daughters was trained on her mission
by Mariah Wheatley, and one time the family came to Utah and stayed
with the Wheatley's. They were pretty excited to hear that Brother
Wheatley was my German teacher and that Brianna was in the same grade
as me. Just another random connection. I'll go ahead and take your
word on that one Andy, about the temple construction preventing you
from finding a mate. I expect to hear some results in the near future.
I also had some solid basketball experiences bro, for the first time
since the mtc.  You're doing great with the quotes Joey, your Queen
would be proud.

So this week was kind of all over the place. Tuesday we got a visit
from an Austrian member, who had served part of his mission in
Stadthagen and wanted to visit some old friends. He ended up teaching
one of our new investigators with us, which went really well aside
from his phone going off...twice. Once in the middle of the lesson
(ended up having a 10 minute conversation with a co-worker) and then
again at the end in the middle of giving him a blessing. Kinda
awkward, but luckily our investigator was chill about it. Then we had
to rush off to a lesson with a couple that a member referred to us.
They were really cool and nice, but they didn't seem super interested.
We have another appointment tomorrow, so we'll see how it goes.

It was a bumpy week with our steady investigators. The one from
Afghanistan, waiting for a visa, ran into some opposition from his
parents. At first they were fine with him being baptized, but
apparently they had a change of heart...and not for the better. And
with the mission policies on teaching people from dangerous countries,
they can't be baptized without the parents consent. Later this evening
we're meeting with them to see what we can do. Our other progressing
investigator Mrs. Heumann is having some slight difficulty with the
word of wisdom, namely with tea and coffee, though considering that
we're in Germany, it's a miracle that that's her only problem with the
word of wisdom.

Other than that, lots of finding. We had quite the conversation with
some born again Christians. It was very friendly up to the point that
we mentioned the Book of Mormon, after which one of them said that he
had read it and received an answer from the Holy Ghost that it was a
devilish book. Elder Barboza handled it pretty solidly. Just bore
testimony of the Book of Mormon and living prophets, and then off we
went. Aside from that our finding efforts led to a lot of solid
conversations, but no real interest. One lady we ended up talking to
for a solid 15 or so minutes on her doorstep, and despite us saying
just about everything we could, and her listening intently, she still
had no desire to do anything other than take a card. In the end, God
is in control, and sometimes there's not much more we can do than hope
that one day these people will realize how much they need the Gospel.

Last thought before I run out of time. I realized this week how easy
it is, even as a missionary, to lose focus on Christ's Atonement. The
restoration, baptism, priesthood and commandments are all super
important, but in the end they mean nothing without the Atonement.
Hopefully this week I can work a little harder at remembering what's
most important and stay a little more true to my promise of always
remembering him.

That's all I've got this week. Keep things real :)

Elder Larsen

Faithless Tomatoes

I´ll keep the nerd advice in mind, Mom. I met Elder Frost once, and just as I was dutifully explaining that his mom was my grandma´s home teacher, I was just about tackled to the ground by a certain Elder Peatross. I should be able to get a new suit in a week or two, just need to find enough time on a pday to go to Hannover. My ``ancient`` shoes died pretty quick, unfortunately. I´ve been wearing the new pair, which so far are working out pretty well. We don´t see too many members aside from on Sunday. A higher percentage in Germany basically just means 0.02% instead of 0.01%. Awesome that the ward dance went well, I knew you were a true dancer at heart, Mom.  I´ll have to read that article, Dad. I´ve only talked to her a couple times. Bigger ward makes it hard to talk to very many people. Better watch out with the "success" word Dad, out of the 36ish combined months that my 3 companions have been out, none of them have seen a baptism yet. Haha, sometimes it´s a tender topic in the mission. Sadly Lisa, I don´t seem to be getting any fatter. It takes a lot of effort just to stay at 145. I most certainly do love the new area. Not gonna lie, that´s quite the quality picture (see pic of Abby, Lisa, Savannah and their delicious breadtwist below). I´m not sure if I can condone eating bread twists without me though. Glad you had a "sick" week, Heidi, sounds pretty rad. I don´t seem to know what I´m doing with family history either. Every Sunday we now have an hour to do Family History work, and I´m kinda scared I´ll manage to mess something up if I try doing anything other than tinkering around and reading stories. Not bad Joey, Zeke can already say "nothing"? I don´t have a clue about the song/movie though. I´ll work harder at not enjoying soccer, though up to this point it hasn´t been much of a struggle.

Pretty solid week over here. Lots of traveling, lots of service, unfortunately not a whole lot of lessons. One of our lessons was in a city pretty far south. Took 4 hours of travel there and back, so working there was basically our entire day. On the way there the guy sitting by us on the train was talking on the phone, and accused whoever he was talking to of being a "treulos tomaten," or faithless tomato...gonna have to remember that one. Also we had splits this week, and while we were doing some service a member called my companion a fat egg. Germans seem to have all sorts of interesting food-related insults. 

Another random experience happened one night as we were going home from an appointment. These two drunk guys seemed confused as to which train they needed to take, so Elder Barboza told them. They didn´t believe him and told us that all we do (as missionaries) is "make crap." Well they eventually found out that Elder Barboza was right, and as we walked by they stopped and apologized. They ended up "escorting" us through Stadthagen and warned us about walking through certain streets at night, and were actually pretty friendly. So I guess the lesson is not to judge people by their appearance...or something like that.

The ward here in Stadthagen really is awesome. Before missionary work and member work seemed very separate from each other, but here the members really want to be involved and it´s a lot more of a team effort. It´s a good reminder that we´re all on the same side here. This isn´t a competition between which missionaries can get the most baptisms, or who can do the most on their own. This is about saving God´s children and bringing them to Christ. 

Love you all and hope you have a good week =)

A Whole New Flippin World

Interesting, so apparently the first paragraph of my email last week didn't disappear...for some reason it just wasn't showing up on my ipad. Bro, you´re gonna have to give me more information than "a ring box." Is this for the same girl who had the sign at the Timpview Car wash? And I see you´re already bringing shame upon the family name by not wasting everyone in frisbee. Tut, tut (tehee). Lisa, you´re just gonna have to blame Joey for asking such vulgar questions. If you liked my ol atheist friend, I´m sure you´ll enjoy this. A couple weeks ago we met this lady who was also of the opinion that we were enslaved by our religion. And yet you could hear how much smoking had destroyed her voice. Apparently not even obvious physical evidence is enough to convince people. That´s a rough way to lose a client, dad. The concept of being a friend to everyone and loving the Lord is definitely a topic I've thought a lot about. Well Mom, you may be interested to hear that I did indeed bear my testimony as well (granted, it was somewhat expected since it was my first week in a new city). Unfortunately there´s still little to see in terms of mountains. That 90 second crying thing should come in handy. I´m basically just bawling all day long, but with that I´ll be able to disperse it into 90 second intervals. I guess great minds think alike Joey, because my old companion also told me that I needed to make Captain Barbosa jokes. How about instead of dictating a letter from Jake to me, you just send Jake to me in person? Since you neglected to match the names, I suppose I can do it myself. The Spleen-Joey, Bowler-Michelle, Blue Raja-Smarty, Shoveler-Jake and Invisible Boy-Zeke.

Well, in case the title didn't make it obvious enough, Stadthagen is quiiite a bit different from ol Berlin. After spending p-day at a Holocaust Memorial (since I guess it´s important to leave on as depressing of a note as possible), I got shipped off to West Germany. Met Elder Barbosa in Hannover and then we were off to Stadthagen, which so far hasn't stayed very true to it's name...haven't met anyone named Hagen yet. But aside from that this place seems pretty great. I didn't really notice it until leaving, but everything in Berlin just seems a little bit drearier. Here things seem to be a bit more alive. Rowdy teenagers, sarcastic members, friendly strangers. The only downside is that there are no longer a billion people on the streets to talk to. In Berlin over the course of an hour you could try talking to dozens of people, whereas here you might get a solid 20... and some of those may be from trying to talk to the same person 2 or more times. So basically it means we do a lot of dooring.

Elder Barbosa is also pretty great. Definitely miss Elder Burns and his constant hilarious sassiness, but Cap´n Barbosa is pretty solid too. He can sing, play piano, speak good German...basically everything that I can´t do, haha.

In terms of the work, we had a few pretty solid lessons. 2 of our investigators are teenagers from Afghanistan, who want to be baptized but still haven´t gotten long-term visas. Right now we´re going through the 5th lesson and working with President Fingerle on what we can do to speed things up. After our lesson we took them with us to the ward sports night and played some soccer. Unfortunately a year of not playing soccer hasn´t made me any better (oddly enough, it´s almost like I´ve gotten worse! shocking...). It was still pretty stinking fun though. We also taught an older lady, who is making good progress but has trouble coming to church because of work. Other than that, finding central over here. We did manage to find a new investigator, a guy who has been going through some difficulties in his life. He´s got some interesting ideas (reincarnation, dead bodies turning into starts, etc.) but he´s open to change and to a better life. Which just happens to be what the Gospel helps people with, what a coincidence! :)

That´s about it for this week, hope y'all have a good one!

Elder Larsen